The power of our thoughts

"Do you think God can listen to our thoughts", asked my niece.

Well, sometimes the problem isn’t whether God is listening to our thoughts, but if we, ourselves, are listening to them. 

A basic rule of communication

Thumper's rule:

I Would

 These past years I have had the privilege to travel a lot and meet extraordinary colleagues from all over the world. Unique individuals who surprise me with their gifts and talents, not only their professional skills and knowledge.

Today’s post – and moment - comes from one of them: Pad, a coach, speaker and poet. 

                             I Would

         What would I do for you?

         I would cover you like the morning dew
         I would rise over you like an autumn sun
         Surround you as a mighty wall
         Fill your wells like a never-failing stream

         Like an eagle I would come swiftly
         To carry you over the wildest rivers
         And ride on to the mountain fortress.
         There I’d hide you from the storm
         Shelter you from every harm.

          I would gather the best I could find
          And bring them to your door
          Dress you in the finest silk
          Adorn you with the purest gold
          Crown you with a rainbow of the clearest jewels

          I would take your hand at evening
          And we would walk the battlements
          The torches ablaze
          The flags unfurled
          A fleet of ships bringing you treasures from the oceans

          I would lead you to a mighty feast
          A crowded hall of jubilant song
          Surrounded here by friends
          That we could trust with our lives
          Your heart would rejoice
          Your cup would overflow
          Guarded by a wall of honour
          Garrisoned by faithfulness

          Until
          The light has faded from the sky
          And we’re alone again
          Just sharing
          Something
          Too deep for words
          Quieter than the whisper of your eyes
          The pulsing of your expectant heart

          I tremble at your touch
          Silenced by your gaze
          In the embrace of your love

          I’m 

          Left

         Speechless.

                              Pad Pax, The Yearning 

Edvard Munch, Kyss IV

The Jonah Complex

Talking business with a friend today, he shared with me the frustration he feels when someone who has the talent, the charisma and vision to succeed disappears when the opportunity knocks at the door.

For my friend it just doesn’t make any sense. Of course it must be insecurity, he said, but why run away from the opportunity of a lifetime if this is your dream?

He spelled the magic word: Fear. It’s bloody fear.

Of course it usually is fear. But it’s not necessarily the fear of failure that is holding us back. Equally important is the fear of success, the Jonah Complex.

The Jonah Complex is the fear of success, which prevents self-actualization, or the realization of one's potential. It is the fear of one's own greatness, the evasion of one's destiny, or the avoidance of exercising one's talents.

In A Return to Love, Marrianne Williamson sums this up beautifully:

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.”

 

Take the quiz to find out how you feel about success.  

Paul Graubard, Jonah's Hungry

Vulnerability: a one-way road

Finally. Finally someone has dared to write about the issue of mental illness in the workplace. Rob Lachenauer wrote an excellent blog post at the HBR on his experience and his thoughts.

Prejudice, fear, lack of information and understanding, make this topic taboo. As a former therapist and also someone who has had her share of challenges with depression, I have many reasons to like this post. Yet what impressed me most is the author’s current practice with candidates: if they cannot share some vulnerability, they are out.

Coincidentally, just before I read this article, the topic of today's class was about Trust; of course, we couldn’t not discuss about Vulnerability too.

"Vulnerability is the only authentic state. Being vulnerable means being open, for wounding, but also for pleasure. Being open to the wounds of life means also being open to the bounty and beauty. Don’t mask or deny your vulnerability:  it is your greatest asset. Be vulnerable:  quake and shake in your boots with it. The new goodness that is coming to you, in the form of people, situations, and things can only come to you when you are vulnerable, i.e. open."
                                                                              Stephen Russell

                     Barefoot Doctor's Guide to the Tao:
A Spiritual Handbook for the Urban Warrior

Hidden Treasures

Six months ago a friend found the most beautiful chest during a walk around the streets of Athens. We were sharing the story today with another friend over coffee when I said to them “this is a city full of hidden treasures; let’s go discover some!”

And so we went and we entered those narrow streets away from the crowds. 
We were stopping and admiring the facades and balconies of the old neoclassical buildings, the ones that you have to look up to see the magnificent of their beauty. We found colorful graffiti occupying the surface of the lowered shutters of the closed shops. We run into amazing little shops with all kinds of treasure, like the one with a space covered with all kind of lamp, of any size, color, shape and style.

In our mind we were feeling joyful with the discoveries of the hidden treasures of the beloved city and the treasure of our friendship. In our heart we were skeptical, sad and angry at the same time with the harsh reality of the homeless making their temporary shelters in doorways and other recesses of the buildings to spend the night.

All these feelings and emotions that emerge by being present and connected were trying to find their inner balance once again.

Note to self: 
Never lose the connection to reality no matter how painful it is. Use the power of gratitude for all the good that is in your life to change that reality.  

Know Thyself

"The recipe for perpetual ignorance is: Be satisfied with your opinions and content with your knowledge."  

                                                                      Elbert Green Hubbard  

Even one child is too many

This week was marked by a tragedy off Farmakonisi islet. One child died and eight are missing in the cold waters of the Aegean Sea.

There is no acceptable number when it comes to the death of children who are being abused, neglected, or left to die in cold waters.

The statistics are devastating for both child death and abuse. Randomly picking three of them:

11500 children have been killed in Syria. Some tortured or executed.

Poor nutrition causes nearly half (45%) of deaths in children under five - 3.1 million children each year.

Every year more than 3 million reports of child abuse are made in the United States involving more than 6 million children.

There are no excuses to justify the maltreatment or death of any child.

We cannot claim to be a civilized world if we allow the maltreatment of even one child, let alone their death.

Patience. Always a virtue?

If Kafka was right and “there are two cardinal sins from which all others spring: Impatience and Laziness”, then I must have lived a very sinful life.

Although I refuse to get rid of laziness, my impatience has not been so fortunate. I worked hard and diligently to learn how to have patience, which I soon realized had more to do with tolerance and trust – at least in my case.

Finishing one more meeting today I was happy to have practiced that virtue and been able to listen and collaborate better.  Disconnecting from work, I reconnected with the other reality I am living in; injustice, cruelty, news full of stories that make no sense in a civilized society.

Ironically I stumbled upon George Washington’s words: “The marvel of all history is the patience with which men and women submit to burdens unnecessarily laid upon them by their governments.” More than 200 years ago and still valid.

Thinking about all the news, current circumstances, things that can make anyone react and respond, and looking at the lack of such reactions and responses, some other words came to my mind: “Patience, n. A minor form of despair, disguised as a virtue.” (Ambrose Bierce)

How much patience is enough? There is courage and resilience. And then there is inertia and hopelessness.

I cannot deny the value of patience, yet there are times where I cannot help but wonder if George Jackson was right: “Patience has its limits. Take it too far, and it’s cowardice.”

Perspectives

There is an Indian story of the blind men and an elephant:

A king brings six blind men into the palace, where an elephant is brought in and they are asked to describe it.

When the blind men had each touched a part of the elephant, the king asks them:

“Well, blind men, have you seen an elephant? Tell me, what sort of thing is an elephant?”

The blind man who feels a leg says the elephant is like a pillar. The one who feels the tail says the elephant is like a rope. The one who feels the belly says the elephant is like a wall. The one who feels the tusk says the elephant is like a solid pipe. “It’s a brush” says the man who feels the tip of the tail. “No, it’s like a throne”, says the man who feels the back.

 

photo credit: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Blind_men_and_elephant2.jpg

The story continues in different versions; in some the story ends with a conflict that is never resolved. The moral is that we should not mistake for the whole and keep an open mind in considering other points of view.  

The parable provides insight into the relativism, opaqueness or inexpressible nature of truth, the behavior of experts in fields where there is a deficit or inaccessibility of information, the need for communication, and respect for different perspectives.

What I personally like more about this story is the significance of perspective. “Any single perspective is likely to be partial, limited, perhaps even distorted, and only by taking multiple perspectives and multiple contexts can the knowledge be fruitfully advanced” (Ken Wilber).

It’s a good reminder for me to seek and explore different perspectives.

Live In The Present

 

"Nothing is worth more than this day." 

Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

     

Legacies

The third Monday of January every year sees the celebration of the life and achievements of Martin Luther King : it is the Martin Luther King, Jr. Day, an American federal holiday. 

Although I am neither an American, nor live in the US, I like to take this opportunity to reflect on his life and legacy. This year, today, the best opportunity came with an article titled: "Instead of Worshiping Dr. King, How About Working Like Him?" 

A light went on in my head. Every day, every time I check my facebook timeline I come across posts with the quotes and photos of different personalities that my contacts share. People that they admire, recognize, worship. 
How difficult is it to stop considering them as something unattainable, as the author of this article suggests? 

How achievable is it for any one of us to think of our role models, the people that we admire and inspire us, and work like them? Instead of just spreading quotes and stories from them, to actually do like them: be the changing agents and follow their legacy or create a new one. 

 

photo credit: http://www.sc.edu/eop/MLK/2010king.html

Keeping the balance

Photo: Wolf/Corbis

Living in Greece we face one daily challenge: to balance.

Waking up this morning I was admiring the phenomenal photos of glowing phytoplankton lighting up an entire beach in the Maldives. Our spirit experiences the exaltation of the beautiful, the inspiring, the creative.

Just to crash moments later in harsh reality, this time following an article shared by a friend, another story of racism and misogyny in my beloved country.

Everyday seems like a constant battle to balance between the reasons that can make us hopeful, optimistic, smiling,  and the news that demoralize, exasperate, shame us.   

Everyday the same constant battle to keep calm, sane, focused and work hard to create the stories we will all feel proud to read. 

Surrendering to stillness

How sweet the moonlight sleeps upon this bank.
Here we sit, and let the sounds of music
Creep in our ears; soft stillness, and the night
Become the touches of sweet harmony.

                                   William Shakespeare 

Tip to reach goals (and success)

This year I set myself a very difficult goal. As always.

As always, I am determined to reach this almost unrealistic goal.

Here is how I am going to do it: everyday I make sure I have taken at least one action towards that goal. Big one or small one, it doesn’t matter. All I need is to have a positive answer when I ask myself at the end of the day: “did I do at least one thing today that can serve my goal?”

Try it:

Set a goal that is really important to you. It can be about your health, your personal life, your career, anything.

Each morning write down one small step that you can take. It can be something very easy to begin with. 

"The first step binds one to the second."
                                        (French proverb) 

If you feel uncertain or afraid, no problem: 

“Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action.”
                                                   (Walter Anderson) 

Keep in mind that action is the best restorer and confidence builder and just do it. The more confident you become, the more motivated you will be to keep going.

After all, 

“action is the foundational key to all success”.
                                                     (Pablo Picasso) 

Don't Give Up

Message of the day and probably the best lesson my parents taught me:

No te rindas. 

Don't give up.

Tribute to M.A.Domingo, a 53 y.o. man who committed suicide in Granada hours before being evicted.

Madrid / OLMO CALVO 

The most effective strategy to get rid of old habits

During a great discussion in a class today, we got to the point to explore strategies to follow and steps that we can take to release an old habit or behavior.  

Students shared some really remarkable ideas and solutions; we covered all the phases: intention, preparation, commitment, awareness. We came up with structures that can be put in place, resources that can be used. But something was still missing.

That little something is very simple and effective. You can watch Bob Newhart describe it in the most eloquent way in the video below:

Stop it!

You have decided that you want to let go of something that makes your life and/or work difficult, ineffective, unproductive?

Step one: identify what this is.

Step two: focus your intention on what you want to do.

Step three: commit to that intention.

Step four: increase your awareness to detect the old habit/ behavior.

Step five: Stop it! 

Then, you can sit back and enjoy the new habit with which you will have replaced it

Rediscovering (one more) Passion

From a pleasant coincidence today, searching for a specific surrealist painting, something wonderful happened: 
I remembered how as a child I became obsessed with Picasso's cubist paintings,

 

Pablo Picasso, Dora Maar Seated 

how as a teenager I fell in love with impressionism  

Claude Monet, Woman with a Parasol

and the impact that van Gogh's self-portraits had on me. 

Vincent van Gogh, Self-Portrait 

I remembered how as an adult my passion for art was reignited when I moved to Barcelona and my excitement of walking around Miro's sculptures and Gaudí's buildings. 

   

Joan Miró, Dona i Ocell     

(source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/oh-barcelona/5101454183/) 

                                              

          Antoni Gaudí, Casa Batlló

I remembered the joy I got from working on my presentation on the Fluxus movement and the enlightenment I felt I was earning by each new exploration. 

Fluxus Manifesto

And while I was remembering all that, I felt my spirit more light and alive, my mind wandering happily through shapes, colors and senses, I felt peace and joy. 

I have always loved art and I have always felt passionate about it. Why did I let this passion fade? 

So, here is one more non - resolution for me to add to my list: to do something daily that nourishes my spirit, my soul and my senses. 

Don’t compliment me please!

Last year I was working countless hours for many months on what I considered a very noble cause. Occasionally I would receive a compliment that would make me feel frustrated, sad and irritated. How can a compliment do that? Easy: I was skipping sleep and all kinds of self-care to get everything done, I was creating structures from scratch, being pro-active, resourceful and managing too many things at a time. When a potential problem could arise, I was immediately taking action forwarding the information to other partners, just to receive a plain feedback about a teeny tiny detail of the “unfortunate use” of an… adjective!

I was juggling tasks, deadlines, processes, people and problems with notable results and no acknowledgment. Oh, but I received a few compliments. And I got upset. And I was refusing to accept these compliments. Why?

The answer came with today’s class on Acknowledgment. Acknowledgement is about honoring someone by recognizing his or her accomplishment or something they’ve done that has made a significant difference. It is genuine, authentic and honest and it is purely about the other person, not our own preferences. 

By receiving occasional compliments (that by the way, had nothing to do with the results I was creating), I felt unseen and unappreciated.

You want to honor others? You want to show them that you appreciate and recognize them; that you value and respect their hard work? You want to have a positive impact to someone’s life and/or work?

Acknowledge them! Acknowledge the unique individuals they are and their achievements.

There is nothing as empowering as showing our gratitude and appreciation by the simple act of acknowledgment.